Monday, November 15, 2010

Clarification - A.

I'm going to use this post to clarify a few things for everyone and to attempt to generally clear up confusion.

I talked to S. yesterday, and turns out she DOES still get pleasure from her breasts! They've just been more sensitive lately.

Guys: the clitoris exists. Its (usually, for girl's bodies can vary drastically) right at the part of the vagina that is the furthest towards the front of her body, right where her labia (the "lips", for those of you who didn't do so hot in biology class) meet. so right at that little point is the clitoris. It can be located up or down by as much as an inch and will vary in size, shape, and sensitivity. USE IT.

S. moves. ALOT. A few posts back I commented on her not moving. I meant in that particular pose we were doing (which took some fiddling with before we successfully pulled it off). And most poses are like that. Don't expect it to be like in the movies where the couple throws each other down and just goes at it. If you are trying poses that are not natural for you, there will be a lot of "Where does my leg go?" and "Wait, how does my back bend again?".

Guys: Use a mushy nickname in front of her friends every now and then, then leave the room for a minute. While you're gone her friends will gush to her about how sweet that was and she'll get to brag about you a lot.
Girls: If you're pissed off at your guy, use a mushy nickname in front of his friends every now and then, then leave the room for a minute. While you're gone his friends will relentlessly mock him and call him whipped and he'll get to try and defend the small bit of manhood he has.

Phone sex is best in the evening. mornings and afternoons are too bright, and late at night you're too tired. Also, getting both of you being in sensual bubble baths with candles around will heat things up. I don't know why, but phone sex plus two bubble baths equals magical orgasms.

Guys: Beware of rushing. "Going in for the kill" (As S. so picturesquely put it) too soon can kill the girl's mood. Always take your time, pace yourself, and relish every single small action. And don't limit your thinking; "The Kill" can be anything from full on dirty crazy sex to something as simple as a kiss. Unless your girl is dripping wet and growling like a little animal, NEVER RUSH IN, no matter how much you want to. If you take your time and draw every little thing out, you will forever be in her mind a diligent, courteous, and unforgettable lover.

Doggy Style. Do it tonight. And don't get in a rut with doing it one way over and over. Just because all pornos use the hands-and-knees variation of it, doesn't mean you have to. Try doing it lying down. The girl should arch her back and not lay down flat (unless she is in complete ecstasy and can't help it. Hehe). Try putting a mirror up so you both get a side view of the action. The way the girl's body curves will be thrilling and watching the very carnal and dirty movement will be sure to heighten the pleasure for you both.

Sex toys are called toys for a reason. They're fun! If you need something to spice up your love life, try a starter kit of simple toys. A good starter box should have:
Normal lubricant (silicone based! water lubes dry out quickly. AND silicone lube can be used in water, while water lubes run away. Did someone say shower sex????)
Soft handcuffs (A pair with pink fuzz will be less intimidating to a beginner. I don't know why it's pink fuzz specifically, but pink fuzz it is.)
Vibrator (A Hitachi Magic wand is the most common and reliable. Knock-offs of the magic wand work equally well. I know they're marketed as back massagers, but they are vibs. Just commonly available vibs.)
A cashmere scarf or cloth for blindfolding and bondage. (Silk scarves are more easily found, but the knots can easily over-tighten and become stuck with the thin material.)
Video camera and/or digital camera (taking sexy pics can be just as fun as making a home porn movie!)
Dildo (Try and find one that does not look like a real penis. These can make guys feel weird. And a smooth one will make insertion easier until the girl's body is used to the new sensation)

Hope this helped!
-A.

P.S. When searching for toys, avoid "Jelly" toys. These contain toxic phthalates, which can be deadly.

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